9/11

Been watching a lot of the 9/11 programs on the National Geographic Channel this week.  So sad!  I actually remember exactly where I was and how my day went down.  I was on vacation down my moms Shore house in Dewey Beach, De.  I had woken up that sunny morning.  And as any other day, I walked straight over to the tv and clicked it on.  It must have been around 9:10a.  I had apparently just missed the planes crashing into the towers.

So, I woke up, turned on the tv and went into the kitchen to make a toasted bagel with cream cheese.  As I was preparing my bagel, I was listening to the tv from the kitchen.  It was news.  I was hearing them speak about the world trade centers but there was not much alarm in their voices.  So I was listening, making my food and then headed over to the sofa to eat my breakfast while watching tv.  I was watching the tv… I did not see the towers on fire. I did not see any recap of what was going on… they were just talking about the bombing of the world trade back in 1993.  I was thinking to myself.. why are they talking about this?  As I continued to watch, I then saw the live images of the towers on fire!  I started wondering, is this live?? What is going on!?  Then I heard about the plane crash into the Pentagon.  OMG… did that really just happen?  Or is this some sort of program.  I couldnt figure out if any of it was really going on?

Then, as I was listening, I realized this was real.  And my confusion turned into fear.  Next thing I knew the towers were falling… another plane crashed in PA. I was completely and utterly scared.  I live right in the middle of all of this!  NYC is just 2 hours north by car.. PA.. next state over.. DC only 2 hrs by car.  I decided to stop watching by like 12.  I walked across to the beach.  It was desolate.  The day was unbelievably perfect.  The weather was JUST PERFECT.  The sounds of the seagulls, the waves crashing.. it was surreal to me to think that all these things were going on while I was walking on the beach and it was total bliss.  But it wasn’t bliss, it felt wrong.  I couldn’t even bring myself to enjoy myself for even a moment.  I walked back to the beach house, packed all of my things and went straight home.

I remember feeling shocked, scared, confused.  But the reality of what had happened was not sinking in.  And the truth is.. after watching all these programs, only now do I see just what happened.  People jumped out of the buildings and there are videos of this.. closeups!  Completely horrifying.  I cannot even begin to imagine the horror of this day.  These men, hijacked 4 planes and smashed them into buildings.  This was a thought out plan, years in the making!  It definitely robbed me of my naivity.   The people, the fires, the smoke, the sense of urgency, listening to people’s last phone calls.. watching them fall through the sky from the tallest buildings, the aftermath.  I see it in a whole new way.   I never knew this had happened.  I Did not want to watch back then.  I used to deal with everything by not dealing with it.  I shove it all aside and keep on truckin.

We are approaching the 10 year date of this day.  And only now do I pay my utmost respects to everyone who was involved or was there.  God bless every single person.  It takes heroes to do the things those firemen did.  Will something else happen?  I do not know.  I think it could and that we all need to be aware.  Will I live in fear everyday of my life.  No, I will continue to live my life to the fullest.

I pray.. I pray for peace on this earth.  Peace between men and women.  Peace between all countries. where everyone lived in pure happiness and freedom. Where the world wasn’t so full of hate.   If only we could live in a world  like that.